Tiny Town

2004-01-10T00:20:00.000-07:00

I got the honeymobile back finally so if any honey's wanna go for a ride give the slime some time and give me a ring. Anyways so last night I had my first nightmare in a LONG time. I mean this dream scared the shit out of me and it was a pretty fucked up one. It was like a mix of State of Emergency (that's a video game for all you who don't know) and 28 Days Later (the movie which I would hope a lot of you have seen cause it is really good). Anyways so for the most part it was in like an outdoor shopping mall (fucked up). There were stores around but they were surrounded by grass and trees. Their were a lot of people around and they were all running (just like in State of Emergency). Then all of a sudden an alarm goes and everyone starts to run around even faster and zombies come and start attacking people. Really fucked up cause they started eatting people while others got in fist fights with the zombies and if you hit their heads hard enough they would blow up and die. Anyways so I start booking it and before I know it I make it back to a beat up apartment were there are like 4 others guys in a room with a candle talking about how fucked the world has become with the zombies and such. This part was a lot like in 28 days later when they get to that guys apartment.

Anyways so after I go to like a laundry room which is a beat up room with a light hanging from the center. NOW THE REALLY FUCKED UP PART, all of a sudden a zombie comes in, and get this, IT IS DR. DRE. HOW THE FUCK DID HE GET IN MY DREAMS. Anyways I beat the shit out of him and he drops a tape. I got back to that beat up apartment room with the guys and I am scared shitless right. So I play the tape and it is a bunch of gangster rap. Anyways then I woke up but damn what a fucked up dream. I mean I was pretty scared when I woke up cause the zombie shit in my dream was kinda scary and it made me realize how scary that movie actually was. I was also like damn what if there is a zombie in my room right now. Anyways that was my first nightmare in a long time and damn was it fucked.

Peace out

2004-01-06T22:04:00.000-07:00

Yo so school is back in and rolling. So I was sitting my ass in social class today and I was playing with my beard when I discovered I can hold the cap of a pen in it. I was like damn this is awesome. So my next goal will be get it thick enough to hold a whole pen in there, MAYBE EVEN TWO!! Oh that will be mighty fine but my parents want me to shave for grad photos but I'm like fuck that shit. So what else is up, hmmm, just finished filming the english project with willy, pretty good results but I wouldn't be suprised if me and him will be the only ones in the class laughing while everyone else will be like 'what the fuck is that, that ain't funny you fat ass'.

So... how about those exams coming up soon. Did you ever notice how fat kids sweat in their seats during the finals. Man let's get some fans in the gym to cool those bags of meat. Anyways yeah it's pretty gay that I happen to have to write both the English and Social exams so I have to come in both those days when some of you cats get to sleep in. Oh well next symester I will be sleeping in both days so suck on those nuts. But hell maybe Rob, Jord, and I will be in the same room writing the Social. Oh the riots we will create. Actually they will be none cause we will sit in our seats like good boys and write that shit.

Anyways fuck that shit I'm outta here. Ummmm, bye, thanks for stopping by.

2004-01-04T21:50:00.000-07:00

TIME FLYS

I haven't written shit on here in a long time but I don't think anyone really cares. So tomorrow so back to school and man it really hit me how fast time goes by. I mean just yesterday we were getting out for break and now we are already going back to school. I mean the future is coming at me really fast and the problem is I don't know what I want it to hold for me. I mean I have no fucking clue what I want to do after high school. So that shit really puts me in a dilly of a pickle cause I mean the days are just flying by but I am still stuck on what I want to do. I mean Alice Cooper nailed it on the spot with I'm 18 and I don't know what I want (although I ain't 18 yet). That right there is so fucking true for me at the moment. But since I am not 18 yet (still got 5 months) I will hopefully have it figured out by 18. But yeah that was on my mind so I thought I would write it down here.

Tomorrow is also the day my car goes in to get repaired after my dumbass of a crash. It's gonna be weird without it cause I mean I haven't taken the train to and from school since like grade 10 so I got really used to having the car all the time. I mean if I think about it holy shit I get that car a lot. I mean concidering it is not mine I get it like all the time which I am really lucky to get. It's one of those things I take for granted but I really shouldn't.

Anyways that is all I have to say for now so I'm out. I'll try and write more often.

2003-12-23T00:51:00.000-07:00

Haven't said shit in like a week so why not say something now. Well it is finally christmas break as you already all know so why the fuck am I telling you that. So far it has been pretty cool, just those cunt bags at work scheduled me too much. But it is being delt with and hell, maybe I will be ultra-to-the-extreme-hardcore and call in sick again. OH SHIT. But I think they would probably clue in if I did it again.

Anyways so let me tell you kids a story. Once upon a time, there was a gangster named Willgerous. This kid was one bad ass motherfucker who grew up on the wrong side of the tracks. All he had in life was his weed and his AK-47. He tried to get honey's but that never worked out cause he drove a soccer-mom-obile. Honey's don't fall for that. But on the other side of tracks lived one hardcore kid named Tiny Normous.He got his name cause of the thing between his legs. And in the thing between his legs I mean his penis. And in his penis I mean his reproductive organ. And in his reproductive organ I mean... well that one kinda explains itself. Anyways one day these two dangerous men were throwing rocks at the tracks and all of a sudden Willgerous threw a rock right at Tiny Normous' head. "What the fuck, motherfucker" yelled Tiny Normous as Willgerous laughed at him. So Tiny Normous pulled out his peice and pumped Willgerous' head full of lead. The End

What the fuck was that, man I am pretty damn bored. I need to get a life. Anyways later kids. Hope you enjoyed that.

2003-12-15T20:56:00.000-07:00

Howdy strangers. Rapid Slime here to say a few words. Alright so what's new around town. Nothing much except Lord of the Rings tomorrow night. That will be too cool. Let's see, so they caught Sadam over the weekend. That was pretty useless. I mean why the fuck do the 'American People' give a flying fuck. What has Sadam done to them, that's right dick all. So shut your damn mouths and get in your damn house bitch. It's like if someone were to analize George Bush. I mean sure I would cry laughing but would I give a shit, no cause he has done nothing to me. Anyways let's see, what else is new. Hmmm, we shall be getting our yearbooks tomorrow, that shall be pretty cool, I better be in this fucking one you cunt ass bastards. My skinney, then new, beautiful me. Well it appears I have like nothing to say so I am outta here. Take care.

2003-12-11T17:49:00.000-07:00

Haven't said a word on here in a long time but it's like that, and that's the way it is. So let's see how about that Christmas break, it is coming soon and I can't wait for that shit. It's gonna be a good week next week. The teachers are usually lazy and don't give too much work. Wednesday, 12:01AM Lord of the Rings with my home boy Willy. Damn that is gonna too cool. We will be getting home at like 4 in the morning fucked out of our minds and to make me even more hardcore I will probably go to school on time the next day. Word to that homies.

Anyways I have come to notice a lot of people are worried about Christmas shopping and are all like 'damn I am so glad I have it done'. I mean damn what is the big deal, look at the date today, it is December 11th and I haven't done shit for Christmas shopping so far. I mean yeah I should probably get it done but what is the rush. I mean the only bad thing is waiting in line but even that doesn't take too long usually. It is all quick and efficent like a well oiled Terminator unless it is Christmas Eve, in that case you are fucked. But yeah I don't see why people stress and worry about that shit. Relax a little, you'll live longer.

Anyways that is all I gotta say, peace out.

2003-12-07T17:51:00.000-07:00

Do you guys ever listen to a CD for the first time in a LONG time and it brings up so many memories. I decided to listen to Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness by the Smashing Pumpkins. I haven't listened to this CD since like elementry and holy shit does it bring back memories. Shit this is such a good CD but I mean even these songs I haven't heard in years sound so farmiliar. Man but this is such a good CD. I can't believe how well I can remember it. I swear the last time I heard it was like grade 5 or something and I still remember it pretty well. Anyways what else is up. Down another weekend, not bad. Just hate all the work but whatever. I got next saturday off so if any of you cool cats wanna boogie woogie down with the Slime give us a shout. peace out

2003-12-03T17:14:00.000-07:00

OK so I know my music kids, I mean I know this shit, maybe even better than Pat (probably not) so I have added a song of the day section. I mean dudes some of the shit I will be putting in there will be off the heezy. Tight ass beats, rockin sounds, you name it, I know it. Actually I don't know why I added it. I mean I am pretty much just copying everyone else cause they have like all done it already. Man I am a fucking phoney. Who am I trying to kid no one likes my music. I mean look at the first song I put on there for it, you will all think it's horrible. Man Rapid Slime you are fucking up your life, don't do this. Yeah anyways whatever, I need something to spice this shit up and it's all I could copy off others for now. Maybe I will get an original idea sometime.

2003-11-30T21:55:00.000-07:00

What up Detroit. Thought I would say a little something since I haven't in a few days. Man I gotta talk about the Simpsons. Now this show has been around for a hell of a long time but I thing they should let Family Guy take over it's place. I mean god dammit tonight's episode was SO bad. I mean come on they can't think of anything funny at all. I don't think I laughed once at it. I watched the whole episode with a straight face. They should bring back Family Guy and give it the Simpsons time slot. I mean they Simpsons have had some pretty damn funny episodes but come on face the facts, it's over. The humour is just not there anymore and it won't. The writers suck and couldn't come up with a joke if it slapped them on their ghetto booties.

OK on another note I have been listening to a fair bit of old school rap lately. But not just any rap, I am listening to the very 'foul, dirty' rap if you will. Stuff like Me So Horny by Two Live Crew and Baby Got Back by Sir Mix-A-Lot. Damn these songs are so funny. I mean yeah you can call them dirty and what not but try and keep a straight face while listening to the lyrics. I know I can't but hell maybe it's cause I laugh at shit like this and I am a sick fuck. Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I find it funny. Anyways I am gonna go now.

2003-11-26T20:33:00.000-07:00

OK I got like nothing to say. I mean I got plenty on my mind right about now but I ain't gonna put it up here. Many because I don't want everyone knowing. Some people might get hurt by what I have to say. Anyways I thought I would just write a bunch of shit on here just to make it look like I updated. I am will leave by saying 'you gotta fight for your right to party'. Never forget that kids.

2003-11-23T01:11:00.000-07:00

OK so today was a pretty eventful day, but I know most of you don't care in the details so I will sum it up in one or two sentences. The manager at work is pissing me off cause of what she did to Kaile, that is a very whore like thing to do, you whore. We'll just say that's about it. Oh and some happy news, my brother got me tickets to Nickelback which is off the heezy. I really wanted to go and now I can.

Now for my topic of the night, I am gonna talk about scream singing in music. I just bought the Live Linkin Park CD/DVD a few days ago and damn, Chester can sing. For all you who don't know who that is, he is the singer from Linkin Park that does the yelling and singing. Ok this guy is fucking good, he can go from a scream, to singing in tune in no time. Plus his screams are so good. I mean he has some quality and tone behind his if you know what I am saying. Most guys just yell when the scream but he has some quality and sound to back it up. He ain't just yelling, it is like he is still singing. It sounds so damn cool. Now I know a lot of hate it when people scream instead of sing but I mean honestly what is wrong with it. I mean yeah I saw Mushroom Head live (don't even know shit about that band and I don't wanna) and yes they were just yelling uselessly into the mic. But I mean when people like Linkin Park do it, it sounds so good and adds a lot to the music. That is all I have to say on that. Basically all I am trying to say is that Chester is a damn good singer and the Linkin Park CD/DVD kicks ass.

2003-11-20T21:42:00.000-07:00

Damn, Damn, Damn, Shit, ahhh, shit, man I haven't said anything on here in a few days. But nothing is new that is why. I got nothing to say. But let's see here, I'll think of something. So how about that Micheal Jackson, he is in some hot water again for tapping some little boy ass. Man he must like that ass like a 10 year old boy. But I mean honestly why is this such a big deal. Kids get molested everyday. But they don't make 'Breaking News' on CNN. I'll tell you why it is on CNN and all over the news. It's cause people love to see the celebrities fall flat on their faces and in this case their face falls in the ass of a 12 year old boy. Like do you really care that much about this? I mean yeah I wanna see how this turns out but I mean people are blowing this out of the water. I don't care THAT much about it.

On another note, Global News sucks dick. I mean fuck they had him getting arrested as their top story and then they go try and make it local by looking at how MJ CDs are selling in Calgary. Then they were like 'oh man look how much are at the store, no one is buying them' YOU FUCKING COCKING SUCKING PEICES OF LESBIAN SHIT. I mean I can't cus you out enough for that. Ofcourse they got plenty of copies, it's called BEING STOCKED. You fucking retards, they make it out as if they have plenty of copies cause people hate him now for this. God dammit that pissed me off beyond belief. If you go to a music store and see plenty of copies of some CD, does that mean no one is buying it cause the hate the person fuck no. I refuse to ever watch Global News again because of bullshit like that. That is not news that is them trying to fill time by doing some worthless shit.

Anyways looks like I ended up talking about a fair bit of shit. That's what I have to say on this whole MJ thing. To finish, I don't care what they say, he still makes great music.

2003-11-16T21:47:00.000-07:00

Haven't updated in a few days. That is cause I got nothing to say pretty much. Let's see, yeah there is like nothing to talk about. But one thing I would like to talk to you guys about is Windsheild Washer Fluid. Be sure to check it on a regular basis. It is very importants especially right now with all the snow melting and shit flying on your windsheild. You want to make sure that it is always full so that you can clean that dirty ass window so you can see. Otherwise you might run into some trouble if you are caught empty.

2003-11-15T02:09:00.000-07:00

So I just got home from work a few minutes ago. Well today I found out about the Staff Christmas Party. Well in previous years I never really had much desire to go. I was not really in the mood, and didn't really know people like I do right now. Anyways there is obviously always drinking right, so I would have only been able to go to the dinner and then leave when the drinking began (Jord would remember Steve yelling at us about that). So this year I am like hell yeah I will go even if it is just for the dinner. But now these fucks are having a big ass one at Outlaws. That means I can't go at all cause I ain't 18. Fuck that is gay, I mean what the fuck kinda staff party is when (well I guess it is only like 4 of us) not everyone can go. Plus this year I really wanna go cause of some of the other people going. But now like 3 waitresses have started Operation Sneak Andrew into the Party. I really hope that works out somehow cause that would be gold. They tell me to get a fake and then just avoid managers from Avenida cause there will be tons of people there, like the 8 BPs from our area are all going. I will have to see how this works out, if I get in it could be pretty damn fun, and funny too. Anyways that is all I got to say. Nighty Nighty little ones.

2003-11-12T21:52:00.000-07:00

OK so I just got off work and I am here listening to my Led Zeppelin mix. Now these guys know how to write music dude, I mean these guys write some of the best songs about girls (or women if that's your pleasure). I mean without a doubt Motley Crue has the best songs dealing with chicks. I mean listen to stuff like Too Fast For Love, Too Young to Fall in Love, 10 Seconds to Love, Girls Girls Girls, and She Goes Down (I'll give you one guess on what that's about). I mean these are like their more sleezy songs about chicks but they are so damn good. I mean some of the lyrics are just gold like in She Goes Down, For backstage pass she goes down. It's so true you dirty groupies. But then they also got some good more ballot like songs like Without You, and Don't Go Away Mad (Just Go Away). Yes these are what songs about girls should be like. Not that fucking Backstreet Boy shit where it's like, Hey baby love I need a girl like you, and tell me if you feel it too. What the fuck is that? I mean rockers know how to sing about the ladies. I mean not to say that their lyrics are better cause I mean they degrade woman sometimes but I mean it's better then singing about being pussywhipped like the Backstreet Boys do.

Anyways that is all I got to say on that. I really wish Motley Crue would get back together and work on some new material cause I mean if they can pull of some music like they did with Too Fast For Love and Shout at the Devil then we would finally have some good new music being made. There aren't any good CDs coming out now a days. I mean there are good things coming out but will I honestly be listening to them in like 20 years. Those Motley Crue CDs came out 20 years ago and I am still listening to it. Same with like Metallica, Van Halen. Stuff like that 2 or 3 decades old and I still love it. I don't think too many of the albums coming out now will do that to me.

2003-11-11T21:32:00.000-07:00

OK so today... oh wait no one gives a fuck what I did today. No one ever does so I ain't gonna talk about that shit. Instead I will talk about something more serious, and that is ceral cutting the roof of your mouth. Now Count Chocula has been spreading shit about Captain Crunch that his ceral cuts the roof of your mouth. That is bullshit, shut the fuck up chocula. You fag ass bitch. Captain Crunch ceral is where it's at cause that shit ain't gonna get all soggy like granny tits after sitting in your milk. No that shit will crunch you to the last crunch. The crunchicity is over the top. Not like that Cinnimon Toast Crunch shit. You leave that shit in your milk for like one minute and it gets all soggy and you end up going like damn, what the fuck is with this shit. And that's Slime's opinion on that.

On another note, do you ever get the Unnamed Feeling. I mean it is the name of a good Metallica song (the next single by them for that matter) and I mean damn it is so true. Do you ever get like a feeling in you that you just can't describe. You don't know what is causing it or what the hell it is. I thought I would mention that cause I got one of those right now and whenever I do I think of that song. Anyways I am out of here.

2003-11-11T00:40:00.000-07:00

Oh shit I am still pretty boozed up. Man I was at Paul's party which was pretty sweet except I was like the only one that got drunk so I must have made an ass of myself. Damn then I was like shit what up honey's to the honey's and they were like get the fuck away from me you fat smell slut, you smell worse then Pauls dog. I was like damn I didn't smell the dog but they say he stank pretty bad. Oh man so if I stink like the dog that must be pretty damn bad so I best go and shower so I can go mack on those honey's and be like oh baby what is up. What the fuck am I talking about I am starting to ramble. Speaking of ramble I burned myself a pretty damn sweet ass Led Zeppelin CD today which believe it or not I am listening to right now. Damn it is some fine ass shit, I love that stuff, so good. Got my Zeppelin, Coke Slurpee and a big fat ass bag of Fuzzy Peaches. Why the fuck did they call it fuzzy peaches, that shit ain't fuzzy, it can cut your god damn mouth up like a phillipino cuts you with a knife. But that's alright cause my Bonavista boys got us some motherfucking AKs and we's gonna bust ass on those Deer Run Boys. That's right, run like a deer boy, cause I'll take pleasure in gutting you boy. Anyways I am still a bit tipsy and am rambling so I am getting the hell outta here. Talk to you later all you cool cats.

2003-11-10T16:47:00.000-07:00

OK so I can finally say what the fuck I want to say here without the willy edit. But it's not like I have anything to say so I will lay down a rap for you guys.

Cruising in the honeymobile
I was look for some poon
I was like damn I gotta find some soon
Next thing I saw this beautiful girly girl walkin
I was like damn bitch get that ass here so I can start talkin
I says bitch what your name be at
Next thing I notice the girls is fat
All that jelly,
I bet that pussy was smelly
So I put my foot on the gas
and leave that ass.

There was some free styling for you kiddies. Something willy was never up for but now I can do it.

2003-11-10T16:15:00.000-07:00

OK Willy left cause he wants to jack off on his own, SO I AM THE FUCKING MAN AROUND HERE NOW. You will see no more serious shit here, you will come here cause you want a fucking laugh and that is what I will give you. Nothing but hardcore anal pounding laughs ya hear. Word to that.